Don't Blame Me OR It's Been a Bad Day

Had a high reading before lunch today. Ticked me off for 2 reasons:

1. I had no symptoms of being high. There often aren't any, which is why I do NOT understand diabetics who don't test. "I can just feel it." Well, maybe they can. Everyone is different, after all. I can only sometimes "feel it", meaning I am either peeing every 2 minutes (OK, I must be high) or I am unbelievably exhausted.

Of course, fatigue can also mean I'm going low. It can also mean I'm just tired for a host of other non-diabetic reasons.

I hate tiredness. I never know what the "deeper meaning" is. It's like some obscure book in the Old Testament. Or Yoga.

2. I had no REASON for being high. I ate nothing different, did not change my activity level, nothing. I finally chalked it up to the cold I'm fighting and the fact that I'm pre-menstrual. (What? TMI? Welcome to blogging, people.)

SO. I had high blood sugar because viruses exist and I'm a female with a working reproductive system. THESE THINGS ARE NOT MY FAULT.

And yet, if I ever do have serious complications, I know there will be many health care workers (not all of them, but many) who will write it off as something I did or did not do. I know this because I've heard them. I've heard Dr. Oz say he hates operating on patients when he knows their heart attacks are self inflicted and could have been prevented with a better diet. It was a Type II diabetic. I stopped watching Dr. Oz.

When I first got diagnosed, my PCP sat and told me about people 10 years older than I am who sit in his office and complain and cry about how awful this disease, and how much pain they're in, when they "have noone to blame but themselves. " He said this. He was trying to motivate me to control my sugars. He is no longer my PCP.

My feet and legs have been burning lately. My A1C's have been fabulous. And yet, nerve damage. It's the disease, not me.

And so, today I whine. This disease sucks. Did I mention the PMS?

My Current Obsession

I have to shout it from the rooftops.

These are unbelievably good. Like, to die for good. No more carbs than regular almonds. Super tasty, though. Also - almonds - good for you and your cholesterol. (If you're expecting super sweet, though, it's not going to happen. These are not chocolate covered almonds. These are almonds roasted with cocoa powder.)

These are also very good. If you're into cinnamon instead of chocolate. How the 'brown sugar' thing doesn't add to the carb count, I'm still not quite sure. But still. Tasty. Mmmm. And again - almonds good. Cinnamon good.

Can you tell I eat a lot of almonds? They are my go-to snack, and lately, I've been getting tired of the regular ones.

These are unbelievably disgusting. I will admit I've steered clear of most sugar free candy, in general, because sugar alcohols do affect my blood sugar a little, and you know, it's not usually all that tasty. But I saw a small packet of these at the Target check out, and I LOVE Werther's candy, so I thought I'd give it a shot. NASTY. One piece in my mouth, and then I had to spit it out and throw out the box, lest I be tempted to try it again. Ew.

And there you have it. I'm now off to see if I can get these things cheaper. Peace out.