Had a high reading before lunch today. Ticked me off for 2 reasons:
1. I had no symptoms of being high. There often aren't any, which is why I do NOT understand diabetics who don't test. "I can just feel it." Well, maybe they can. Everyone is different, after all. I can only sometimes "feel it", meaning I am either peeing every 2 minutes (OK, I must be high) or I am unbelievably exhausted.
Of course, fatigue can also mean I'm going low. It can also mean I'm just tired for a host of other non-diabetic reasons.
I hate tiredness. I never know what the "deeper meaning" is. It's like some obscure book in the Old Testament. Or Yoga.
2. I had no REASON for being high. I ate nothing different, did not change my activity level, nothing. I finally chalked it up to the cold I'm fighting and the fact that I'm pre-menstrual. (What? TMI? Welcome to blogging, people.)
SO. I had high blood sugar because viruses exist and I'm a female with a working reproductive system. THESE THINGS ARE NOT MY FAULT.
And yet, if I ever do have serious complications, I know there will be many health care workers (not all of them, but many) who will write it off as something I did or did not do. I know this because I've heard them. I've heard Dr. Oz say he hates operating on patients when he knows their heart attacks are self inflicted and could have been prevented with a better diet. It was a Type II diabetic. I stopped watching Dr. Oz.
When I first got diagnosed, my PCP sat and told me about people 10 years older than I am who sit in his office and complain and cry about how awful this disease, and how much pain they're in, when they "have noone to blame but themselves. " He said this. He was trying to motivate me to control my sugars. He is no longer my PCP.
My feet and legs have been burning lately. My A1C's have been fabulous. And yet, nerve damage. It's the disease, not me.
And so, today I whine. This disease sucks. Did I mention the PMS?