Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I Need....Something. Not Sure What, Though.

I desperately need to gain weight. It's not healthy, my body-type. While I have always been an the scrawny side, this is not good. I can't understand it, really. My sugars have been fairly stable, I eat plenty, why am I getting so skinny? Is it because I've had a cold? I go into the endo next month, I can't wait. I have questions. Like mainly, how do I get fatter without screwing up my sugars royally? If he says "eat more" I will lose it. That's what everyone says, and IT'S NOT WORKING!

Today I went to the gym, in an effort to up my exercise for this year, and also to hopefully put on more muscle. I also upped my carb count (and dosage) at breakfast, since it's possible that my carb restrictions are contributing to my weight loss. Oh yeah, Curves was CLOSED at 11:45 on a Tuesday, and I checked my sugars before I went in (as I do before exercise) and I was at 200!!! (90 minutes post meal, so some insulin was still working I guess, but ugh.) Um, what was that about "my sugars have been stable?"

I lost it. I mean, really, truly, lost it. I will probably drop the Curves membership, because seriously, the hours are crazy enough (they've always been closed from 1-3, which I have never understood), and if they are shortening their hours even more, I simply can't do it. It's not like they have child care. If they're not open during afternoon kindergarten, forget it.

So I came home, checked my sugars again (172) and turned on my Wii fit to get my workout. I dropped the sugars to 103, and got my 30 minutes in, all the while boxing my arms off. I was mad, and the boxing felt good. I'm ALWAYS mad at a high sugar reading. I mean, if I'm counting my carbs and not eating doughnuts, and my sugars are still crappy, then what the hell is the POINT???

And HOW the hell am I supposed to gain weight? Upping the carbs just screws up my sugars, eating more calories isn't doing it, exercise isn't doing it, I need....something. Help. I need help.


  1. Have you ever tried a protein powder added to your cereal, a smoothie, or just alone? I guess asking the doctor will help you know your options, but there must be some answers out there. So many of us have the opposite problem of having too much extra weight, but I'm sure it is frustrating to work so hard and still have these challenges. Hang in there!

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